DRAMA OF FAITH

At one moment in our life we feel absolutely loved by God.  

Loved and I love Him. (express it with feelings)

 And then suddenly, you begin to question, demand, feel anguish, frustrated!  

And at another instant, praise Him! Adore! Contemplate His glory! 

After which silence followed, as if God is unreachable. Silence that shatters your being.  That feeling of being abandoned by Him.  Reaching to the point of saying,

 ‘ My God, where are you? Do you even exist?’

 Yet, the answer remain silent.

Who can escape any of these? Not even holy people, or saints.  How much more you and me, don’t you agree?

But looking at the cross, like Jesus who shouted feeling in despair,

  ‘My God, my God! Why have you forsaken me?’

He feel silent before God. And realized the truth about the Father. 

‘The Father loved me.  I am His beloved child. I am loved.’

And that brought him peace. He conquered the suffering on the thought of DEATH.  

Because LOVE IS BEYOND FEELING...

FAITH IS NOT A FEELING. IT IS KNOWING.

Knowing what?

Knowing that no matter what I have done, what I will do. 

I AM GOD'S BELOVED CHILD.

 He loves me for no reason. And God doesn’t care whether I return that love or not.

I will continue to love God imperfectly. That will be enough – for now J

<excerpts from 2014 notes>

LOVE IS BLIND

image from: http://health.9news.com/images/articles/heart_eyes.jpg

My Lord, you covered my sight

And opened the eyes of my heart.

It is walking not by sight,

But by your might and love.

You prevented me to see things with beauty,

Splendor or none at all!

Yet this, all these things are temporary and may lose from my eyes.

Is it beauty I seek?

Is it gracefulness?

Is it lust?

None my Lord, cover my eyes..

That judges anyone or anything unpleasant.

Everyone has eyes for good and not good.

I seek only the truth,

And most of the time my eyes is fooled.

Love is blind, it cannot see anything not good.

Love is blind, it cannot judge.

Love is blind, for it opens itself for only the truth.

Love is blind for it is always patient.

Love is blind, for it never recognize no one..but only the HEART.

<excerpts from 2014 notes>

WOMAN OF LITTLE FEET!

Excerpt from Desert Day journal
Silent Battle and Miracles
March 1, 2015
Holy Spirit School, QC

I slept and had a strange dream..I was in this place out here, as I struggle to contemplate. I slept and in my dream... I struggle too and slept. 

I was with the devil and Jesus. We walked through life and he asked me, "Do you really believe that He loves you?" And Jesus was just silent.   He  showed me the world - disasters, my favorite friend got sick and we came to a house in a snow. "Do you know that in that house, someone died single? Do you still believe that He loves you?" And then he laughed.

And so we came to this very spot where I am sitting right now as I write.   They are two big man. (I'm in their middle). "How can you say that He loves you?" I looked at the devil blankly.  I took the hands of Jesus. He laughed and they both laughed. Jesus said, " Oh that again. the nails!" And they laughed. 

 I feel... that even me, I am not fully convinced with that answer of mine. DO I REALLY BELIEVE THAT IS HOW MUCH HE LOVES? Or was it just an idea because eversince I was young, that is what is taught in the church, in schools, in songs, in tv, in Superbook, by the preaching, in books. I just don't know what to answer or how to answer. I just hugged Jesus. 

The devil traced my feet on the ground (my little feet) and the feet of Jesus. (see below... please do imagine a better image)

We all looked at the feet drawing, sabi ko lang... "It's funny." And he laughed. I awoke in that dream, and my present dream.

I woke up and started to cry.  I hugged my Bible and really feel that I was here (now). Alive! 

I shared my dream with my PLW family during our community meditation, no matter how irrelevant for others it may seem.  I asked them, why did the devil laughed?  They all laughed as well and jokingly said. Because your feet was little compared to Jesus.  You were a "Woman of little feet" or was it "Woman of little faith" as feet - faith mispelled.  

Still, the question of that devil lingered... 

"DO YOU LOVE HIM? DO YOU REALLY BELIEVE THAT HE LOVES YOU?"

"Thank You my God, because it was all a nightmare. The bad dream of a night that now belongs to the past. Meanwhile, give me patience and hope Your will be done. Amen"

(Excerpt from Encounter Book Prayer - Times of Depression)

Now a 2-year old PLW Guide

October 7, 2014 - So much has happened since I was send forth as a PLW guide last 2012.   As I review some notes from my PLW formation journal, I was reminded of the people I was grateful for...
sharing these ( Unedited)

October 7, 2012 - Desert day and Sending Forth

A LETTER OF LOVE AND THANKS

May the last pages of this journal be a letter of thanks  who helped me through my journey

 in PLW Life and friendship.

Lord, 

Thank you so much first of all to you for everything you've shown and given me.  Forgive me at times I was ungrateful for the happiness and trials you sent me in order for me to grow, love more and become closer to you.  I love you dearly, beloved Jesus.

I thank you for Dra. Joy Lara, for being a mother, friend and guide.  Very consistent, insistent, patient, peaceful and loving.

I thank you for sis Emi, I learned a lot from her as a teacher and a friend.  Most is a guide who's most wisdom I value, especially 'How and what a guide is expected to be and should become.'  I value a lot from her, like 'I commit', discipline with time; heart,grace+effort during preparation, being responsible, value of sacred half hour, and a lot more.

I thank you for sis Edna, she is my model as a guide also.  She is honest and put so much heart and soul everytime she speaks about Jesus and prayer.  I value how she corrects me at the end of the sessions and appreciation if all was well. 

 'The participants should feel and understand your explanation.  So put your heart and soul in it.  The Spirit.'

I thank sis Connie and sis Amie, they are like my great ates'.  We have strength and weakness, uniqueness.  But I value every honesty and their patience in listening to my stories and sharing theirs, including their impressions and also insights in some things I barely understand on what I was going through.  It helped me very,very, well.

I thank sis Gaye, she is like a dear friend, reflects or let me see my own reflection if I cannot see.  Help me realize, process a lot of things by sharing her stories and insights.

I thank You for sis Luisa, for her thoughts and reflections.  No one is perfect, but still, everyone is loved by God.  Her wisdom guides me.

I thank You for sis Kath and Che, they are so kind and I learn a lot from them, especially about life and love.  I also love sharing stories with them. :)

Bro. Derrick, I look at him as a model, his way of giving workshop, and positivity in everything.

Kuya Tomas, I learn a lot from his journey and experience, including his stubborness and I laugh a lot with him. (hahaha!)

To all the guides during the culmination week.  Their experience, passion and love for family and service in the evangelizing task.  It inspired me as a newbie and as a lover of Christ.

To my angels - Rem, Chard, Irene and Evan.  Thank you for the friendship and love. I learn a lot from them.  I was loved, hurt, greatly challenged, tested as a person and as a Christian.  I learn a love about ACCEPTANCE- love as is, where is.  Love is unconditional and has no expectations.  PASSION FOR SERVICE- it doesn't count the cost, the weather, health, physical circmumstances, serving the suffering Christ with everything available to give. TIME- time is only limited like a sower who's only given time to plant and not to harvest.  I have more seeds to plant.  Let God do the growing and let others harvest.  LETTING GO- there's so much to do.  So never ever cling or tie yourself to a friend or even to something.  It might break your purpose or drag you down.  Even lead you to possessiveness. Its scary! PATIENCE- waaaah! I couldn't say more! But it leads me to understand.  TEARS - made me realize true love.  COMPASSION - I would never ever maybe understand what compassion is until I needed and felt it through you.  FRIENDSHIP - is never bounded.  A friend is a friend forever. No limits.  LOVE - I can't even thank you enough.  I vow to be the best of friend I can be with all that I am and with the love of Christ.  Forgive me sometimes If I am being selfish.  But know that I love you and you had been a special part of me.

PLW BACOLOD MISSION - A STORY OF GRACE

November 30, 2013

Speech on Sharing of experience on Annual Reunion of PLW Guides as a Bacolod Missionary 

I am a new guide. I have been send forth October 2012 last year. I had my 1^st PLW sessions last January with Sis Connie Vasquez as co-guide here at Bago Bantay, Quezon City.  We have 3 PLW sessions in Bacolod, every Saturday. Two at Palau Youth Center, La Salle Avenue  - 10 am and 3pm session and 7pm session at Tangub parish.

 FEAST BACOLOD and PLW BACOLOD DREAM

The dream started when Kimee and Rinah, former participants who have not completed the workshop, asked if there is a possibility of bringing PLW to Bacolod.  I won’t forget November 2012 last year, during the Kerygma conference,   Bro. Bo asked everyone asked everyone to write on a white flag the dream we wanted to surrender the following year. Rinah and I shared with the flag provided. On one side she wrote, the Feast Bacolod and on the other side I wrote PLW Bacolod. 

                

We raised that white flag with certainty, proclaiming the dream. Not knowing how it would happen.  But God always gave amazing surprises. =)

December 28, 2012, since I had a scheduled visit for an ministry activity in Bacolod, I met with Rinah and Kimee  and with those who are interested in PLW , and gave them an overview.  Some friends from Bacolod and Iloilo also joined us and shared their experience. 

 "There is a need for prayer. And how do we pray?... that is why we offer the prayer and life
 workshop." - I love this part na kahit sa kabilang table, listened well after hearing this part and
 listened also to the sharing of personal experience of former plw participants.

 

         PLW Bacolod meeting with Rinah Marie Vinco, Kimee, Intercessory Head -Feast Bacolod,
 friends and former plw participants - December 28, 2012  at Island Spoon

       On January 19, 2013 Rinah met with Manila guides for update on PLW Bacolod Plans.

Then Tito Domeng visited Bacolod for plans and orientation.

GOD’S GENEROUSITY and PROVIDENCE

We had the dream, but where to get the funds? We started to share the dream to other former participants and other co-guides, they wanted to contribute for the dream so they pledge to sponsor for two-way airfare.  That gave us high hopes.  Sponsors keep coming. I told myself, it is really happening.

THE KEY WAS SURRENDER

It came to a pause when I was told that priority will be given to Cebu mission, so PLW Bacolod was still uncertain for July cycle. This broke my heart and left me crying all night asking God, why did He placed this desire in my heart and yet won’t push thru. I prepared well for the trip – my health, cleared my weekend skeds, adjusted with my ministry work for I was very sure I will be going to Bacolod. I even had my vocal chords medically checked (no kidding!) That night, prayed the Hymn of Abandonment. “Not my will, Lord, but yours. Your plans are always better than mine.” This gave me peace. Kinabukasan, nagulat ako with a surprise call from Tito Domeng that PLW Bacolod will start on July 13 onwards, and about to book several “sponsored” flights. Surprises kept coming. Rinah and Kimee at the same time in Bacolod do the promotions, attending community gatherings (Bukas Loob sa Diyos, Ang Lingkod ng Panginoon, LOJ), visiting parishes talking to priests and friends. In less than a month, 16 flights were booked na. The Key was surrender. God showed me what little I can do and what He can do if I allowed Him and other people.

 Thank you for those who sponsored for the Bacolod trip. For the former PLW participants, co-guides and others. I know only of a few, the rest I don’t know. Maraming salamat po. Si Lord na bahala mag reward for your generosity and support for the mission.

MISSIONARY EXPERIENCE

My initial response doing the mission work was EXCITEMENT. Na sa sobrang excited, di nakatulog for my first flight to Bacolod with Bro. Derrick.  I woke up late and arrived at the airport, last call na and passengers are about to board. But I felt grateful dahil mabait ang taxi driver and airport staffs were very accommodating. I bet God was laughing with us but at the same time embraces and says, ‘Do not be afraid, I am with you.’  

I have a lot to share about my experience. but I had an unforgettable message during my August desert day I had in Bacolod which was very true for me.

His words through the book Embraced by Bro. Bo:

Do you seek tangible results in your service?

Be faithful to the routine of planting and plowing and watering. Beloved, that is your task. Whether you harvest abundantly is not your primary concern.  Often child, you seek the wrong fruit from your work.  You concern yourself with numbers, goals and successes, while I concern myself with the increased holiness of your soul, the growing love I see in your heart.

And during the 14^th session, one participant affirmed this message. She said, 

‘I know. I am very sure that at one point in your service you felt disenchanted by the decreasing number of participants. But I want you to know, that one invitation is enough. The people who are here, like me who felt so much joy of experiencing the love of the Father will be like a pebble thrown in the water and would create ripples. We cannot help but share and let others experience also. Thank you. Just continue and don’t stop.’

Now we have 11 participants who are discerning to undergo formation next year, two of them are in their Youth. One 19 and 21 years old, who persevered through the sessions.  So please, let us pray for them too.

LEARNING EXPERIENCE

1. From the 14^th session. “The apostles of all times and ages should act not trusting upon their own preparation or ability, but in the power of Jesus. Effort, preparations, prayers are very necessary. But the result is not up to us but by the Grace of God.  Everything is Grace.
2. The mission work is never about I-alone, but We- together as family, brothers and sisters. God’s message for me during the desert day before the start of the mission was Isaiah 43:1-7. Where he commanded and promised.” Do not be afraid, I am with you.”  I felt God through prayers encouragement, love and support from PLW family especially from Sis Connie. There was also a time when I had work assignment in a dangerous place, got sick and even lost my voice prior to Saturday.  But because I know very well, God wouldn’t allow me to be absent on my workshop sessions. All is well. We had no cancelled sessions despite the earthquake, heavy rains, storm, brown outs and I never had cancelled or delayed flights.  God was present though people, friends, Bacolod people especially kimee and Rinah, and even strangers. God gave me friends who are also doing mission work – through them my struggles were bearable because of their insights and sharings. God gave me so much love and learning from Bacolod people. Through them also, they give me strength and courage facing troubles.  I am also happy for the visiting guides, Bro Derrick, Tito Domeng and Tita Mila. Those who joined me on my (unknowingly) birthday – sis Janice, Emi and Edna.  

                              “Do not be afraid. I am with You.”

    3. Humility in accepting God’s providence through other people. If it is God’s work,

        surely He will provide everything – finance, food and shelter. Your only focus is to 

        do, what you are expected to do.

   4. Constantly rectify your intentions. Only God should be the moving force behind your

       work. Everything depends on your intentions. God cannot bless the works of a person 

       who through the work of his apostolate systematically seeks his own self-interest.              (LSG)

   5. Pray, even if you don’t feel like praying.

   6. Receive and always be love-filled. God’s love is everywhere.

Thank you.

POINT OF REFLECTION - MIRACLES

August 1
First Friday Mass, St. Michael the Archangel Chapel, Trinoma,QC
(excerpt from homily of Fr. Carl)

'And He did not perform miracles there because of their lack of faith.' - Matthew 13:58

Today, people of present world find it difficult to see miracles.
Someone asked, 'Father. Why is it that in the past and the time of Jesus, there were many miracles recorded in the Bible. Bakit ngayon, parang wala na masyadong milagrong nangyayari? why?'

Two things

1 - Hangga't kaya pang ipaliwanag ng reason. Hindi milagro yun. Dahil, we become more       intelligent, analytical, magaling!

2- Dahil hindi ka na naniniwala sa Diyos. We often fail to see how the hand of God works in little or daily miracles. Because we believe so much in ourselves so much already.

How can God show you His miracles... if you do not allow Him?
How can God guide you...if you do not follow?
How can God give you His message...if you do not listen?

Look at the birds....

"YOU WILL NEVER WALK ALONE. I AM HERE WITH YOU."

July 13, 2014
8:00 A.M.

(Excerpt from journal notes )
Kanina I was watching two birds. They look like gray kalapati that looks like a quail. I don't know if they are lovers, or best friends, or mother and son/daughter, or brothers or sisters. I kept observing them. Both are walking together, fly together, but at the same time busy picking up something for themselves. Sometimes, when they are too busy picking up something, and the other looked up, and the other bird seemed distant.  The other bird gets near him.  They pause for a while, and again do what they have to do.  Although they were super close, the birds don't pick up something and give it to the other.  They do things individually.  Even when are with a group of birds like them, or a maya bird came to say hi and make chika2 with them. You can identify them, because of that special bond between them. Everyone eventually flew away, and still both of them remained together.

I think the two birds look after each other.  Though they are busy with their own tasks. They always make sure that the other never feels "alone", always.  Siguro commitment nila yun sa relationship nila.

Go ahead and share your own reflections....


Monthly Desert Day of Guides & Sending Forth
Holy Spirit School - QC

Stubborn - who me?

Did you ever encounter yung mga ganitong eksena...

When you come before God in prayer and ask Him,

'My Lord, I am your servant. What do you want me to do? What do you want to tell me?'

And God responds through the scripture, through inspiration and even through reflections of present events in life. He speaks His will clearly to be sure it would be fully known to you. 

And then, you choose a beautiful imaginary red hanky and blindfold your eyes, then cover your ears with your hands.  Again, respond to God and exclaim...

 ‘But my Lord, I can't seem to see. I can't seem to hear your voice. I don't understand what it is you want to tell me? What you want me to do.'

And then because of His infinite patience, offered peace.... and revealed His words again through the scriptures. This time, full of promises to make you feel secure and loved so that you may be able to be strong child, full of trust. Still....

'My Lord and my God. You seemed so silent. I want to seek you. Where will I find you? I want to hear your voice. Please lead me.'

And God, in all His being a very understanding Father show himself to you. In His image, His sacred heart through broken tiles in a common eating area. "I am here. I can be everywhere. I am with you always."

 And now, here you come to tell God.

'Lord, I literally see and find your image, which is extraordinary for me. Should I take this seriously? Or am I just trying to convince myself that it is you who showed this to me?'

And then I can imagine God covering His face and laughing at my own stubbornness.

Sometimes, God give clear answers to our prayers. But when we get answers that make us uncomfortable, we would rather feel confused, blind and deaf than to choose to peacefully accept and surrender to His Holy Will.

Jesus promised, "In me you will find peace. Do not be afraid, I will be with you...forever.'

Well, Love is an unending journey to obedience...

Oh my Jesus, help us every day to fully trust and pray,

'Not my Will Lord. But Yours. Thy Will be done.'

Day 6: HOPE (Honest Obedient Prayerful Enduring)

Lotus flower, Mekong Delta, Vietnam

Stop for a minute now and pray. - Reginarosa Power Message deskcalendar ni ateEmelyn

Most of the books I've read both for single men and women always have this verse in their first few pages.... 

'Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.' - Psalm37:4
But this is absolutely true for everyone...WHO to prioritize and WHAT to hope for.

January 6, 2014 - A day full of worries, fear....stressed mind and heart?

But at the end of the day, a verse resounds in my heart and ears.

A great way to start and end with a smile. Love and be loved...

Day 5 :REJOICE (Paulit ulit na joys)

little joys,beautiful joyce,me asungot man kay joyce,joys over hot choco,mirror with joyce, rejoice! 

'Be joyful always' - 1 Thessalonians 5:16 


January 6 - Sunday ( Feast of Epiphany)

It was a joyful day for me...the talk at the Feast is entitled rejoice.  In everything, in happy times and suffering. Rejoice! Praise God in every need and deed.Indeed! 
I had joy joy joy joy in my heart throughout the day!

(sharing joy pics with Joyce, Cathy, Chris, Mark, Chard)

Day 4 : SO DEEP

Carbin Reef, Sagay City

''Roda,you are my dearest child.The one I love best.
Whenever I mention your name,I think of you with Love.
My heart goes out to you,
I will be merciful.

Set up signs and marks on the road,
Find again the way by which you left.

Come back Roda,come Home.' -Jeremiah 31:20-21
note: I changed Israel to Roda to make the passage speak to me personally. Whenever you read the Bible, you can change the names (e.g. Israel, Mary, David, Moses) with your name. That makes the Bible so alive and speak to you. It would definitely amaze you. Try it!


January 4, 2014 - A saturday time to enjoy "me time" Few thoughts about love, how to love, recieve love, plan about love, and everyday declaration of love and surprises.

Its great to know that there is Someone who love you best...and is in love with you. think of you lovingly.

This make me feel so secure and loved. A well loved person, enjoy loving others also. =)




God loves you!

Day 3 : FALLEN LEAVES

La Salle Eco Park, Granada, Bacolod

'Don't be afraid to move forward, for the love of you-self' - Connie Vasquez

It is also important to be kind to yourself  =)

January 3, 2014 - A warm heart to heart to with a roomie, at the same time a sister and friend.

Thank you!!! Love you sis!

Day 2 : Take some patience to look closely...

December 27, 2013 at Masskara Chicken Inasal, Bacolod City

January 2, 2013 - Today a reading from Warrior of Light by Paulo Coehlo reminded me to look closely on the details...patience...

awareness..

notice...

appreciate..

appreciate...

Day 2 on 365 days of love and surprises for 2014

PAANO MO PINAPAKITA KAY GOD NA LOVE MO SYA?

                                 the Love of God is not a question, it is always available. 
                                  But how do we respond to God is our responsibility. - Bro Joe Dean

Early today, an eager little girl asked me. 'Ate, me tanong ako. Everyday, paano mo pinapakita kay God na love mo sya?' Series of explanations prompts me at that moment and make me wanted to open my Bible and send a Bible message. But I paused and asked the same question to myself. 'Oo nga anu, paano nga ba?' (puzzled by my own complexity) It was a question of a child. How can you even make a simple practical explanation, she would readily understand?

 I paused and reflect on today. 

'We love because God loved us first.' - 1 John 4:19

God is love.I am loved. Therefore I love.

God is Love. Love? its definition is limitless. There is a discovery in every experience. Intimacy in Prayer and His Word.  

I am loved. Giving thanks and praise is acknowledging His presence in my life TODAY, as in now.  Count your blessings today, it is more than 5 for sure. Blessings such as hearing a beautiful melody, was not late for work, someone smiled to me today, I woke up happy today. All the things that can make you smile or feel loved from the world and from people. For me this is filling up love tank. It should never ran out!

Therefore I love. How do I respond to God's love?

 And because I am loved, I can love others. Others in general term referring to what we can sense - what we see, hear, feel, smell, do! Not just people, but absolutely everything.

Simple question expects a simple answer.

How do I show God that I love Him?

Dear child, personally.. when I feel loved. I smile. I look at God that way also. I am sure He smile too when He feel loved. =)

Therefore eto lang din ang tinatry ko itanong everyday,

At the start  and throughout the day I ask, 'How did God made me smile today? How can I make others smile today?'

At the end of the day I ask Him, 'Did I make you smile today?'

Today I was reminded of His love through an angel. Today I was reminded also of that everyday question. Today I begin again. Today I smiled. 

Hope this answer you, my dear child. =)

Friend..I am passing to you the same question, 

' Pano mo pinapakita kay God na love mo sya, Everyday?'

LOVE LIBERATES YOU.....

October 23, 2013

Dearest,

Since Sunday, I had been counting all the love I received or more so love given to me by a lot of people, especially from the Bacolod people. Oh, God. It was so much. I was overwhelmed..because last week. I was love-filled. But I realized I had lots of love neglected consciously or unconsciously because I gave only to a few people in my circle, admitting...that I expect also to receive love back only from few also.  Yes, I received love. But I did not accept love coming back to me, through other people even outside of my circle.

I am loved...

Love is not an idea, it is an experience. Love is indescribable, as lovers might say. Love is....

LOVE EXISTS IN DIFFERENT FORMS. When we give love, it comes back to us not from those people we give but through other people and through different forms.

Love exists and manifests itself in many different forms...through kindness, smiles, laughter, words of affirmation, a friendly gesture, a friend who gave his/her attention to what we have to say, or a sincere words of praise, a pat on a back and a time spent.  It is not exclusive to a care, to expression of thoughtfulness or words we are familiar of like 'I love you', 'I like you', 'I care for you', 'you are important to me', I adore you'

I thought I know so much about love, but now I realized that I only knew so little..

I haven't recognized love at all most of the time! I focused only on what I knew about love. Love had become a common term. An ordinary thing. But I am glad of the loving experieve.. I had a little knowledge about love. But it means for me to learn more, do so much more! Give so much more! Receive so much more!

LOVE LIBERATES YOU BECAUSE IT WAS NEVER MEANT TO BE EXCLUSIVE. Because all the while (in terms of the opposite sex or a male), I give and expect a lot from a certain person. I expect a lot or hope so much, to change...to be a better person for me and for other people (according to my definition of better person).  Having that thought, it was never free love – it was selfish love.  My love became limited for other male beings, because I gave to him a lot. I failed to recognize the love given to me by other male species. 

QUALITY OF GIVEN LOVE IS NEVER DIMINISHED. But something is amazing about love.  The love we had not received, are just there...waiting, ready when we are ready to recognize and accept it. Dearest, I thank you so much for all the love you gave me through people I love and through other people.  Love is never diminished though it can never be quantified. 

LOVE IS UNLIMITED, I AM A LIMITLESS BEING.It is a liberating experience, because love is not limited.  I can love more.  I am capable of accepting love from anyone, from another being. Love in so many different forms..love given by God, and the world. I felt grateful, I am loved.

taken at Carbin Reef, Sagay, Negros Occidental

You are an awesome God, my dearest Father. I'm sorry for the times i failed to recognize You or acknowledge your presence.  You are love, love yourself. You are a being, an energy, a force that I need. I love you with all the love i received and can give. No matter how much I want to give you, I can never outgive you. Everyday...you gave me all that I need. All the reasons I can give to the world comes to one...I love you with all that I am. 

Love liberated me, because I am limitless.....you made me limitless capable of receiving, being loved and giving more. =)

SHY MOMENTS

orioto.deviantart.com

Oh my, those shy moments I have..

When I could have said something to brighten you up

but I choose not to.

Could have seen your face, and gave you a smile

Could have looked straight at you,

but too afraid my eyes would tell you

so much more than I can ever tell

Those shy, sweet moments..

I bother to let you see..

Those shy sweet moments..

I was scared for you to walk away..

And never, oh never mind...

I could have told you, you're amazing!

I could have listened to everything you have to say...

I could have, but was so damn..shy!

2 PIECES OF CHOCO WAFER

'I was hungry and you gave me something to eat.'- Matthew25:35

This happened over a year ago-It was my first time to join a regular street mission activity of my friends in Pasay. It is their late afternoon activity after the PICC Feast. They offer not just food, but friendship and God's consolation.

Since it rained that day, my friends decided to visit streetfriends in their (I cannot very well define it) but its a home or an area where they rest. They live in an identified environment of high social stature - like almost beside the lobby of Traders Hotel, CCP grounds, along the gates of PICC and below a bridge which served as roof near World Trade Center.  Streetfriends are very simple people, yet a life of poverty , makes their situation worst. Looking at them, I felt pity. That surge of emotion which says, "kawawa naman sila" (poor them).

Everytime we visit another home, I felt more and more hungry...even thirsty.(the fact that it was already past dinner time) I was a mere observer but not quiet.I expressed my sentiment of exhaustion from that long walk under the rain, feeling of pity and HUNGER.

One person frrom the group (I can't consider him a total stranger, but neither a friend yet), he gave me 2 pieces of Choco Nissin Wafer and told me, 'Dont let them see you eat or else they might even beg that out of you.' I never hesitated the offer eventhough I felt inconsiderate of my companions.How could I, I was honestly hungry!

(note: choco nissin wafer is actually my "hungry food". I always have a pack at home, office and especially during travel. Something to eat, or give away when someone asks, or share to a stranger on a bus ride. I always make sure I have a biscuit ir a wafer in my bag for hyperacidity. But none that day)

While my friends are busy ministering, I opened one and slipped the other on my bag, then ate at a "shadowed area". I had only a few munches and yes, that mere stranger was right. A kid beg the rest. Maybe, he thought what I am eating was more special. (I guess, indeed!) It may never  had made me feel physically full, but it made me smile. My soul was fed by a mere gesture of kindness.

Not long after that, we had dinner :)

The following day at the office, I told myself, 'I'll never eat you (wafer) unless I'm really really hungry'. But alas! A cat or maybe a rat ate it! Oh well, maybe they need it , more than I do.

Still, I reflected... that night, he gave more than 2 pieces of choco wafer. He gave me a taste of an understanding on compassion.'How can I ever repay him?' I don't know if he needed anything, with all the gratefulness I felt, I wanted to be an angel for that person. I can never offer him enough but friendship, prayers to protect his good soul and a smile.

 I am blessed to have him as one of my great friends today. There may be times when things seems harsh, but I am always lead back to this very day. 'I was hungry and he gave me two pieces of choco nissin wafer to eat. That's Kindness.' My friend, I can never thank you enough. =)

SIMPLY GIVE...Unknowingly, you're being an angel in human disguise for that person. It may be little giving for you, but for the heart of the one who receives compassion...little is not even a word.

 God bless you!